Mary Corning know must show

Those Who Know Must Show

I was motivated to write this after reading a post from a fella who experienced conflict while speaking his truth in regards to some outdated beliefs in traditional horsemanship.

He made a very valid point that when we want to be a voice for change, many traditionalist retaliate and often with a brutal and aggressive debate.

This ongoing separation has been a cause for war throughout humanity.

In my work I label it, “A tug of war with no end to the rope.“

I want to share that, indeed, there is another way. I use examples and metaphors to describe what I call, “Door number 3”. Examples help because this option can seem very foreign to people. Human defensiveness is very dualistic. Typically it’s right or wrong, in or out.

This is not a new dilemma.

Those who have a message for change are often, undoubtedly met with opposing opinions. It’s true that some of our greatest teachers of peace have been executed in the name of tradition. I feel that we shouldn’t just write this off as an unfortunate human tendency.

The pattern of diabolical dialogue must change for our world to live in peace.

We cannot continue to do what we’ve always done and expect change. We can’t fight against those who fight against us and debate truth.

The truth itself needs no debate. What it does need, is expression!

We need to model, for our world, another way.

Those who know must show!

I find it much more effective to show the results of a peaceful life rather than telling someone who has not yet found peace in themselves that they must change what they think.

For peace to be consistent (therefore to be real) it requires living life from a non-personal origin. This is completely obscure to the vast amount of people on this planet.

* What is it to be non-personal?
* What does that even mean?
* Would I not lose myself if I loose my person?

I feel that left unanswered, these questions stifle change. I intend that my life, my message and this page be testimony for what I speak of here.

Horsemanship has provided ample examples of my transition to living from a non-personal nature. And it stands as a consistent metaphor

For example:

As I moved through my exploration of horsemanship, I left many “Marys” behind. Even the identities who, I felt, operated at the best of my ability—the Mary who knew success, quickly became outdated.

Learning from the grandfathers of conscious horsemanship, in the days before it was popularized, has been a deeply transformative process.

My old selves fell off like the horses shedding winter coats. Facets of myself, opinions and beliefs dropped away from lack of purpose.

Even knowledge can be outdated. Life is about change!

It’s not unlike religion. When the spoken truth in the words of a prophet, ultimately create a culture and that manmade collective perception makes truth (which is changeless) into something seemingly divisive.

Soon the knowledge of the prophet is lost and cultures form, alienating others and the truth is once again buried under perception.

What does it mean to live and express from the changeless?

Mary Corning Grace by cabin

It requires that we stay grounded in our true nature.

We can learn to live an undiluted, lovingly neutral life. We have seen prime examples of this in our human history.

It’s important to note that neutral does not mean passive. Neutral is vivacious and alive. Neutral’s spaciousness ends limitations. I struggle to write words that can convey it. It’s easier to say what it is not, than point to what it is.

Simply put, If there is separation we are lost.

To give an example:

All of my life I dedicated to learning horsemanship so that I could be the best horsewoman I could be.

I learned, lived and spoke of horsemanship for over 30 years. But it was not until 3 years ago when I realized the most crucial missing link in this ambition.

I was coming from an ideal that was based in the person that I saw myself to be.

3 years ago I acquired my ultimate teacher. A young filly that I named Grace. She was born out of Ray Hunt’s mare. Most of you know that Ray was my ultimate mentor. My book is dedicated to him.

Now, having the opportunity to start one last horse gave me the chance, I felt, for a do-over. Grace gave me the chance to correct my mistakes. This, for me, was even more impacted by the fact that Ray’s mare—Grace’s mother, died while giving birth to her.

Ray always said, “The horse was the teacher”. Grace showed up and so did my advanced education. It was a perfect time and the perfect experience to show me what I had missed. My life changed the day she got off the trailer.

I can only contrast it with Far Go, my horse of 29 years. Far Go and I traveled countless clinics, and he helped me learn everything I could from my personal standpoint. But the most important thing I learned, came most recently. It was my realization that, even though Ray’s teachings were all about, “Being there for the horse”, I had been missing this point.

I was there for the horse, but it was because of a personal agenda! My source was untrue. My source was personal.

Grace broke this in me because the value of our union was so high and evolution had me primed for the change. The time was right to let go of Mary.

I had to let go of my personal agenda to see true nature… mine and subsequently Grace’s. This study still continues today.

I still, often, fall back and find myself trying to force my old outdated ideals onto my relationship with Grace. But it won’t hold water. It doesn’t stay for long.

Many of the traditionalists scoffed at some of the changes I made. After all everything was new to me. I wasn’t even sure of outcomes, of course others who weren’t living in my skin couldn’t be sure of them either.

But one day, I had a whisper in my ear in the barn while I was with Grace. I can’t say where this message came from. But, I can say, I perceived it from the voice of Ray Hunt in my heart. The message was as clear as ringing a bell.

And it is what this post is all about. The message spoke to me of showing what’s possible rather than telling about it. This message still guides me today.

I hope that Grace and I can inspire positive change by living an example. I’ve never known such joy and truth. There is no flying lead change or blue ribbon that could have initiated this realization. It can only come from love.

Love is real.

There is no end, no change, and without a doubt… no separation.

Have peace to teach peace.


If this blog resonates with you, please consider reading my book Perfect Practice. You can read an excerpt from the book HERE.

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